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Royal Cornwall Show 2007

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THE ROYAL CORNWALL SHOW

I decided to go to the Royal Cornwall Show, which is held every year in June at white cross near Wadebridge. I wanted some one to go with so I invited a beautiful 70 year old widow lady that I know from Bodmin moor, she lives on a farm, and has always lived on a farm.

Before we go any farther I would like to describe in my own words what she is like.

We have a beach close by which is a natural beauty spot you can, swim, sun bath go boating or fishing, collect wood for your fire or you can just relax and take in the splendour of the whole area and let the world go by, the beach is called Booby’s Bay and it reminds me of this woman, so that was the name I gave her Booby’s.

Booby’s came for me in the morning she looked very smart in her black and white spotted dress and her hair was superb it had a little piece of hay in it, we had a greeting hug at the door, she wasn’t a bit shy, the Postman seen us, and not long after everyone knew about this gorgeous woman that I was taking to the show.

Off we went in her land rover to the show ground, we got there without any problem, it was a big vehicle but she could handle it, I kept looking at her little hands, and I thought those hands have done a lot of work on her farm on the moor, she has got 50 cows and 100 sheep and she tends to them all, feeding and caring, delivering their baby’s those hands must have delivered scores of lambs and calves I thought, I pictured her out on the moor, in a gale force wind with rain and sleet pounding down, she would never retire.

We parked the car and got out, I said lets take our bearings so we know where we have parked the car, then she put her arm in mine and we walked to the show entrance, she carried a big hand bag it did look heavy, I think she had a set of plough shears in it. It was another glorious day, and once inside we looked at every thing, the flowers, the animals, the tractors, clothes and dresses we missed nothing out, we met lots of people that I knew, they had never met Booby’s before and they all wondered who she was. We came across the bulls and went to look at them when a big Friesian bull came out she gasped and said look at the testicles on that one. (Well she didn’t actually use that word but we will leave it at that). I said yes there massive if you got hit with one of them it would break every bone in your body, she laughed turned to me and said, Ed you do make me laugh. Then we heard a voice calling us it was a stall holder, he said come in to my tent for a free cream tea your son and daughter in law are my best customers, he also said how stunning Booby’s looked and I replied yes she is, even though she has had a lot of spray over the bow she is still stunning. I couldn’t believe how romantic she was she wrote me a letter, a love letter it went like this I should be home hay making but I am having a fantastic time here with you, love Booby’s. I took the piece of paper and turned it over, although I cannot write well, I wrote I love Booby’s, I love Booby’s from old big bollocks, she laughed once more. To you city folk who read this might not understand it or think it is a bit crude, but down here people with the Cornish culture and sense of humour would find this very amusing a in some cases romantic. We went to the fair and she said, come on lets go on the Ferris wheel, I didn’t particularly want to but I didn’t want to say no, I didn’t want her to think I didn’t have any steel in my belly, mind you I kept my eyes closed all the time we were going around because I didn’t want to look down, she didn’t even blink I suppose she was use to climbing so high up on the hay stacks and bale Ricks that this was nothing to her. She bought me an ice cream, I felt like a child and that it was my mother looking after me.

Well the time came to leave the show and we made our way back to Padstow where I was going to treat her to a meal in Rick Steins restaurant  but sadly it was closed so we went to another little café where the chef cooked me a lovely breakfast I was famished and ate the lot. I said I would take her out on the speed boat but they had stopped running for the day she said that she didn’t mind as it looked very scary, told her that there was no need to be scared while I was there, I might think twice about going up on the Ferris wheel but the sea is my heritage and in my blood that’s the danger and thrill that I crave.

We came back to the stones as the day was drawing to a close and she had to get back to her family, (all her cows and sheep). I told her that I have had a most wonderful day with her and she told me that her day had been a special day a one in a lifetime day, and at that moment we embraced each other and kissed each other on the lips gently, that’s what I call velvet kissing, I will always remember her by that magical, mystical kiss. We walked around the garden and I talked about the pagan religion and the druid way of life, and she was spellbound by what I had to say, I asked her if she would like to become a high priestess, yes she said that would be wonderful I got my ceremonial robes, not many people have seen me in these robes they were made from a special material given to me by a famous American musician.

We walked to the rocking stone where I swore Booby’s in as a high priestess and a part of the St Merryn Druids.

For whatever reason a farmer instinctively knows when to cut his corn, and as it was getting close to midsummer’s day I also knew that the time was right for me and Booby’s to join as one, so I asked her to form a partnership with me in the old way of the druids, and get married for 1 year and a day. She said YES. But there isn’t anyone to perform the ceremony. I can do it I told her, I am qualified to do this, I have done it before, but what about witnesses she said, I said we will let the spirits be our witnesses.

We walk to the wedding stone, as we stood there a mist rolled in from the sea, it was the Merlin mist and I felt this was a blessing, a blessing from Merlin.

We stood next to the wedding stone and held hands; I said we are here today in front of these spiritual witnesses, to join us 2 together in marriage, I asked the 1st question to myself, Edward Prynn do you take this woman in marriage, yes I said. Next question was for Booby’s, do you take Edward Prynn in marriage, and she looked at me with those dazzling eyes and said yes I do. Next question, Edward Prynn do you give your word in front of the spiritual witnesses that you will look after this woman and be a pillar of strength for her. Yes I said. The same question went to Booby’s, yes she said I will.

I ended the ceremony by saying , we ask a special blessing for these 2 as they join in a friendship marriage may they be blessed and let the light of love shine on them give them good health and happiness and let them give love and happiness to others for evermore.

I knew we had done the right thing it just felt right.

It was now time for her to leave we embraced each other for a while and then she left back to her farm on the moor I watched her go and knew there would be a lot of other exploits for us both.

 

TO BE CONTINUED